Thursday, February 15, 2007

Impending Divorce

Cris, my husband, asked me for a divorce February 13th. The evening before Valentine's Day. Today's the 15th, the day after Valentine's Day, and I just don't seem to know what to do. I'm getting advice left and right, and, even though the advice I've been getting is generally very true, and very good advice, I'm scared to death. Cris just got promoted, and he'll be re-stationed to Washington state soon, and I was so happy and so proud, but apparently I was alone in feeling these things. I have yet to tell my parents about this, but I plan on telling them today. They'll want me to go back to Maine, undoubtedly, but I have a friend in Georgia who has a job waiting for me, and is going to help me find a place to stay where I can have my cats. As soon as I get the money, I'll make the five and a half hour drive down there. I'm trying to get a job, and I need to go back to a place today to see about it. I want so badly to hold on to Cris, to not let him leave me, but he seems pretty set in this. We're going to Chicago this weekend with his friend Keith, and to see Keith's girlfriend. It's a four day weekend. I don't know how I'm going to survive this weekend without falling to pieces. My heart is breaking.
It was only a few days ago that I half-jokingly told my friend Sarah that if things didn't work out with my marriage, I was sticking to women. I suppose one of the nice things about being bisexual is having that option. Of course, when I said it, I didn't think I'd be considering my options so soon. So, I guess I won't be dealing with the military lifestyle much longer.

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