No more hope, no more faith

I sit here alone at half past midnight, with no one left to call, and nothing left to hold onto. I can't continue to hurt people, I can't continue to wreck everyone's lives. I've done all I know how, perhaps sometimes giving up is not only the correct choice but the only choice? I've been living with this man for two weeks, and already seem to be causing more problems than one should ever be allowed to. I'm King Midas' long lost cousin- except everything I touch turns to shit. I don't know what I'll do, I don't know where I'll go. I suppose I'll have no choice but to move back to Maine. I don't ever want to fall in love again. I don't ever want to bear my heart, nor hurt anyone else's again. I just want to fade into the background of life and disappear. I don't make a difference, I fear I never will, and that is not something I am okay with...