Anxiety In Moderation

I've been waiting for the other boot to drop, but it hasn't happened.
I feel like I've been holding my breath for a week now in anticipation of today, and nothing has happened yet that will allow me to breathe.
I have gotten a number of things done in this clinic that have needed to be done for a while now. We've been so swamped that little but important things got put on the back burner.
Today, the ball has been retrieved and I am exhausted, though it is only 1430.
I am taking a brief break to collect my thoughts and attempt to make sense of everything going on in my head right now. I am pretty sluggish, though I don't feel as though I should be tired today.
Tonight, I will finish the last small details of cleaning the room, short of the floor which needs to be completely scrubbed and will take a day out of a weekend to do, and get to bed early. This all is, of course, after PT and dinner.
I am proud of how far I have come and how much I handle. Today, I've surprised myself by busting my butt when I wanted to be lazy the most. I had two soldiers go to parade rest for me today, and, though I naturally told them to relax, it felt better than I expected to have someone give me that respect. I am a SPC- the most in-between of all the ranks, and probably one of the more thankless.
I am proud of all I have accomplished, even if the people who are supposed to notice don't. My patients do, and it is for them that I continue to be a medic, and keep my drive to be the best medic I can be.
For once, things feel like they are in order: my finances are stabilizing, my uniforms are squared away and inspection-ready, my room is in enough order that I'm not overwhelmed by the thought of a room inspection by anyone who happens to feel the need to do one, and the points where my personal life and professional life intersect seem to be getting squared away. It is a good feeling to have things a bit more settled, and maybe even a tad predictable. I didn't know what I'd been missing all these years!
So, back to work with me.