Heart And Whole

"The way you overcome shyness is to become so wrapped up in something that you forget to be afraid." -Lady Bird Johnson
That was my quote for the week this week.
I think it worked.
What I've started doing (or attempting to, as circumstances allow) is journaling (on here or in my actual journal, depending on what I have to say, and whether or not it is public material) in the morning and the evening. It's helping a lot. That was a PTSD/anxiety-related suggestion from SGM B. As always, the man knows what he's talking about.
I'm also picking a quote each week, something related to something I'm struggling with (google rocks) and placing it on my google calendar, so that every time I update it or refer back to it, the whole week has the quote visible. It's a great reminder, and helps keep my mentality positive.
I'm on a profile, as of Wednesday, for my back. It's basically an at-my-own pace profile, which gives me the freedom to do all the working out I can, without risking injury due to unit PT pushing my limits. I did PT in the gym this morning, and smoked myself royally. I'm sore today, from it, which means tomorrow I'll hurt worse, but I didn't over do my back, while still getting abs, thighs, cardio, and upper body done. I also am doing a lot of extra stretching. I'm really proud of myself. I have a semi-goal of a 300 right after coming off profile. To be honest, it's not realistic, but I'd lose my mind if I got my first 300 that way. I'd be thrilled.
I still want my corporal really badly, but, well, I think the last company really got me out of feeling that was possible/reasonable. I want corporal despite it being known as the 'bitch rank' of the Army, because not everyone gets it. To hold that rank would mean more to me than my e5 ever can, because I know I can make e5. I have, honestly, seen some truly bad leaders wear that rank, some soldiers with no leadership position or experience at all. Corporal is a very big deal to me, though I see more and more how rarely it is given here, which makes it seem more unattainable, but also more valuable, at the same time.
I guess we'll see.
Top says Soldier Of The Month Board December, Promotion Board December, and I better have my Correspondence Courses maxed, of course. That 300 PT Score would REALLY help!!