It's Good To Be "Home"

I've ended my relationship, and, thankfully, on good terms over all.
It wasn't a lack of emotions, it was an excess.
I need to take care of me for a while, and remember how to do that, before I can work another person into my life. MY life. I have this horrible habit of revolving my world around the person I care about, and then begging, nagging and b*tching at them about how much I need. That's wrong, and something I need to stop on my own. I am the only person responsible for me, and I need to remember that, and really, really learn it- live it.
I haven't lost any friends in the process of all of this, and have managed to make one. I'm not committing to anything, but it's nice to have a man in my life who doesn't drink. Seeing as I don't waste my time being friends (or dating) boys, the term man applies to all my brothers/male friends/ex boyfriends/etc.
I feel like I've come home in a way, with all of this. It's a relief, which I didn't expect. I expected lots and lots and lots of pain for a while. I'm glad I miscalculated that. I'm at peace, in a way. I don't feel like I'm hurting anyone, because I can be honest with all the people I'm close to right now. I'm not hurting myself trying to fit myself into ideals that I want to fit in, but am truly not comfortable with. It's really an incredible feeling.
I have learned a lot over these last couple months, particularly about myself. I am grateful for that. Whether or not I choose to be in a relationship at any point in the next 225 days before I leave here is not something I'm going to attempt to predict, nor will anyone else's advice sway me. I want to take my time, I want to go at my pace, however fast or slow that may be. I know there's a few things I want to change the next time around, and I need to find the strength within myself that I may be able to implement those things fully.
To my King... thank you for everything you have taught me. I am grateful for your friendship, guidance, and continued support, no matter what the end result is. I am lucky to have a friend like you. As I said before, we are friends first, last and always. There will be no changing that now. Mizpah.